Mixed faith couples forced to flee J&K in order to get married

“We fled Jammu and Kashmir to get legally wedded and now live in Delhi,” says Nitin, “I was born in a Hindu family. I’m an atheist. My wife Shazia is a Muslim—who is thinking of becoming a Buddhist in the near future.”

But in Jammu & Kashmir such happy endings are rare. A young Muslim woman (her name is being withheld) is struggling for her life right now at the Government Medical College and Hospital, Jammu after jumping off a bridge over river Tawi. She wanted to get married to a Hindu but both the families were bitterly opposed.

J&K, which boasts of a separate Constitution, a separate penal code and a separate flag, does not however have anything like the Special Marriage Act, 1954. As a result, a large number of inter-faith romances fail to get converted to marriages. The more adventurous or those who can afford it, like Nitin and Shazia, move out of the state.

Advocate Deepika Singh Rajawat, who deals with matrimonial cases at the Jammu Bench of the High Court, says: “In the absence of Special Marriage Act, people do suffer in more than one ways. As of now, only customary marriages are solemnised in our state. Law takes a back seat when it comes to inter-caste and inter-faith marriages.”

“Recently, I came across a case of a rich man who had married a woman after a whirlwind courtship. They got a marriage agreement attested from the public notary in a court and subsequently started living together. A few years later, the man abandoned her—and only then did she become aware that she wasn’t his legal wife.

After getting their marriage agreement attested, they were supposed to go to an Arya Samaj Mandir for Saptapati to get a Praman Patra (certificate). Even this Praman Patra is not considered valid when one goes abroad. One has to submit a copy of Praman Patra in the office of Deputy Commissioner to get a valid marriage certificate after marriage registration, says Rajawat.

To runaway couples belonging to different faiths the Special Marriage Act—which stipulates that any Indian citizen or an Indian national abroad of marriageable age, can get married without changing their religious identities—does not however promise immediate relief.

“When a couple is on the run fearing for life—as the relatives and families become hysterical in such situations—they’re always in a hurry to get married. But it’s not possible even under the Special Marriage Act,” points out Nitin.

He goes on to explain, “One of the applicants must be a resident in the Marriage Registrar’s district for at least 30 days. After all the criteria are fulfilled and relevant affidavits filed, a notice of intent is put up on the premises of the Registrar’s office for public viewing. And if no objection is raised to the marriage within that period, the marriage officer finally allows the marriage to be registered under the Act.”

“But these 30 days leave a couple vulnerable to victimisation. Several fanatics and rouge elements belonging to fundamentalist organisations keep tabs on such notices. They either tip off the families concerned or start victimising the couple directly,” he laments.

“Special Marriage Act 1954 is awaiting ratification by the J&K State Government. Its ratification is a policy decision which solely rests on the wisdom of state legislature,” says Dr Manju Jamwal, who teaches law at University of Jammu.

Not all the marriages registered under this Act are inter-caste or inter-religious. It promises several other benefits. Unlike customary marriage laws, it doesn’t compel one to change his or her religion or surname. After marriage, a woman or a man don’t have to change their name in documents such as Identity card, Voter ID card, Ration card, PAN card, bank account, driving license and with employers. Only marriage certificate would be enough in such cases, point out experts.

The Act also promises low cost and convenient marriages. “Under this Act, only 3 witnesses are required besides basic documents and a notarised affidavit. The fee is also nominal.

“The constitution of our country guarantees right to freedom of religion and right to freedom of marriage. But in case of inter-faith love relationships, both the basic rights are denied in Jammu and Kashmir when one right comes into conflict with the other,” complains Nitin.

“While the rest of the world has started allowing live-in relationships and same-sex marriages, we in Jammu and Kashmir remain stuck in a time-warp, ” he laments and wonders if a progressive, upwardly mobile society can live with a feudal mindset.